Dear Diary,   I awoke in the dark and the whole world was bouncing up and down.  I decided to remedy to situation by waving my arms wildly.  "OW!" "Omg!" "That hurt!" "Sorry somebody.  Where are we?" "I don't know, I think we're on a ship.  Did you get kidnapped when you were eating at Outback?" "No, I was just shopping at Bloomingdale's." "Oh, gross.  Maybe you deserve to be here.  Anyways, do you have some food?  I'm starving." "Yeah I had a takeout Chipotle burrito in my bag somewhere..." "Uh oh.... does it have meat?  Because they wouldn't like that very much." "No no, it's fine, it's vegetarian wrap." "It is?" "Yeah... a vegetarian's meat wrapped in a tortilla!  HEHE!"   So me and some random girl (or a guy with a really high pitched voice) started eating my Chipotle burrito which was unfortunately cold and squishy, but better than nothing.  Suddenly a door was thrown open, blinding us with light.  "WHAT ARE YOU EATING?" "Um... she said it was okay because... this is a um... vegetarian wrapped in a ... um... tortilla?" "OH!  The animality!!"   They weren't too happy about that so I got sentenced to the worst galley job of all.  Separating the colored paper from the whites to recycle.  "HAVE WE LEARNED NOTHING?!" "Shut up and sort!" "Ooooh you enviromentalists are such paleo-conservatives!  Out in the real world colored and white people get married but on your ship you can't even have their paper in the same basket!" "PAPER AREN'T PEOPLE!" "That's a slippery slope young man.  First paper isn't people, next you'll be saying that the Chipotle burrito isn't a people!" "Can we make her shut up?  Do you have another tranquilizer dart?  No?  GO FIND ONE." "Here I make my stand!  On these two recycling bins!  I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to self evident that all papers are created equal!"  I have a dream on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former construction paper and the sons of former snobby cream colored resume paper will be able to sit together in the printer of brotherhoo..."   I don't really remember what happened after that, but either I continued to make the greatest (original I might add) speech in the history of humankind or they shot me with a tranquilizer dart. - Michelle Update:  I'm pretty sure I made the speech. - Michelle